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Succession

Here's a Spuffy ficlet, written for the "first" prompt at still_grrr.


(What was Buffy and Spike's first kiss, anyway?)




Succession

The first time Buffy kissed Spike – really kissed him, with lips touching softly, passionately, and breath coming faster every moment, and hands curling softly in hair, and the rest of the world melting away – it was perfect.

They were going to be together forever, the perfect couple, they were made for each other (and she couldn’t believe she’d never realised it before), and every problem would melt away, because love could conquer anything.

Their love was real, their wedding would be perfect, and they were going to live happily ever after.

She couldn’t understand why Giles was looking so annoyed.


* * * * *


The first time Buffy kissed Spike – really kissed him, not because of some spell telling her she wanted to, but because she really did – it was important.

Important that she tell him, important that he got what she meant, that she could show him it mattered, what he’d done, it mattered.

And even though she hated his guts, even though they were standing in a cemetery with dust making the air musty, even though his mouth was cut and bruised and swollen, even though he was completely evil… for one tiny moment, she really did mean every bit of it.


* * * * *


The first time Buffy kissed Spike – really kissed him, urgently needed to kiss him, needed to feel him kissing her back – it was real.

It was there.

And suddenly, she was there, too – not wanting to be there and not feeling real, not wishing she was somewhere else entirely, not thin and faded and barely existing, but there. Right there, right then. Kissing a vampire in an alley, with feeling flooding through her, everything rushing back in and making her her, holding her, grounding her, being real and solid and… there.

She felt more alive than she’d been in months.


* * * * *


The first time Buffy kissed Spike – really kissed him, definitely kissed him, because she’d thought it through, over and over, and plus she’d been wanting to for weeks now, and she just had to kiss him, right now, in case this was her last chance – it was different.

Tentative, and new; both of them uncertain and fumbling and really hoping the other person would keep kissing them back. Almost like they’d never done this before.

Maybe it was a bad idea – but she didn’t care. She was going to stay here kissing him, in case she never got to again.


* * * * *


The first time Buffy kissed Spike – really kissed him, properly, perfectly, with everything she had in her – it was…

It was messy. With demon corpses everywhere, and blood on his face, and green ooze covering her clothes… and she really didn’t care.

It was emotional. She wanted to hold him, to kill him for not telling her he wasn’t dead, to cry, to hit Angel for staring at them, to get her clothes de-oozed… and in the end she started giggling in between kisses, because it was so ridiculous.

It was Buffy kissing Spike. And that was all she wanted.



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